When you know what your senior’s wishes are for the end of her life, you have a much better opportunity to get as close to meeting them as you can. It’s a difficult talk though, because this often means addressing some scary topics.
Your Senior Isn’t Alone in Not Wanting to Talk about It
If it seems as if your elderly family member doesn’t want to talk about her wishes for the end of her life, you’re not imagining it. Lots of older adults feel as if it’s tempting fate to talk about those sorts of things. Or your elderly family member might feel as if talking to you about her final wishes is something that you’ll take badly. She may not want things like a feeding tube if it comes to that, for example, and she may worry that you’ll push back about that. But this is a talk you have to have.
But She Absolutely Does Have Final Wishes
Even if your senior insists that she doesn’t want anything specific at the end of her life, she likely does. There are decisions about medical treatments, where your elderly family member wants to be if her health deteriorates to a certain point, and so many other choices. If this isn’t something that you and she have talked about already, you do need to get an idea how she feels about some of these situations before she’s not able to tell you at all.
Let Her Know You Want Those Wishes Met
One of the ways that you may have better luck talking about this topic is to remind your senior that you can’t help her to have the end-of-life experience that she wants if you don’t know what her wishes and needs are. There’s a lot that you can do to make her life easier and more comfortable, but if you’re flying blind that’s so much more difficult than it has to be.
You Don’t Have to Tackle This Alone
Tackling this topic on your own might have gone worse than you expected in the past. Now, you might be in a position to have a little more help. One of the things that hospice care providers do is to help your senior to express what her final wishes are. That’s all part of the hospice experience, ensuring that your elderly family member is as comfortable as possible as she’s facing the later stages of her life.
It’s important to have this conversation before it’s too late but pressuring your senior probably won’t work. Do what you can to encourage her to open up.
IF YOU ARE CONSIDERING HOSPICE CARE IN YUBA CITY, CA, FOR AN AGING LOVED ONE, PLEASE CONTACT THE CARING STAFF AT PARTNERS IN CARE TODAY. CALL (530) 885-9948.
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